Yesterday was one of those days. I know I'm not alone. I'm not pretending no one else has tough days. But I do choose to vent and share my highlights:

1. Jackson accidentally dropped a liter of Grape soda, spewing stickiness across my kitchen floor. I am allergic to stickiness.

2. Rod is on a business trip, meaning I am a single parent of 4 children for 3 days. (This is day 2.) Did I mention he is close to the beach?  While I was doing MOUNTAINS of laundry, I received a lovely text message from him - a picture of him laying by the ocean. I called to tell him how mean he was and he asked me if I could hear the waves. Nice.

3. Stray children were in my home off and on all day long. My house is the hangout house. I am aware the reason for this is that I'm the only mom in the neighborhood who is crazy enough to allow them to play inside. There were six extra boys in my home today- raising the child/adult ratio to a dizzying record high of ten to one.

4. Gunner, the wonder dog was upset by the loud, stray children. He followed them down to the basement and proceeded to bark, bark, bark, pause...... poop. Which in dog language means: "You all are driving me crazy. Why are you on my turf? I'm going to mark it for you right now, so there is no more confusion."

5. Gunner's tactics worked. Kids started screaming and ran outside. But not before they tromped through the poop, dragging it all over the playroom, stairs, hallway, and garage.

6. The above stress (and others that I have chosen not mention) provoked me to spend spare moments eating Poptarts, Pringles, M&Ms and Diet Coke as if I had lost my mind. I refuse to go near a scale.

So it was a long,long day. I know there are far worse things that could have happened. And I'm well aware that my life is good. For that reason I tried to take the day in stride, without displaying a major meltdown. But at dinner, I humbly made the following plea to my children:

Me: "Guys, can you do me a favor tonight? During dinner, please don't quote movies, TV shows, cartoons, video games, etc... Let's just have a nice, normal conversation."

Boys: (Blank stares)

Me: "Come on, all I'm asking for is a little original thought!"

Long, long pause......

Bo: "I got nothin' Mom."

Ben: "Is it legal to possess a taser gun?"

Me: "OK. New rule. No one talks."

Bo: "Mom, you really need one of those spa vacations, don't you?"